What Are You Really Telling Customers? 13 Touchpoint Translations

Language barriers can be confusing. And when interacting with someone who speaks a different language or uses a different dialect, we have to be careful. The same is true for customers. After all, it really isn’t what they hear, but what they feel that will affect the outcome of their journey.

So we decided to share some sample touchpoints and translate them for you.

1. We’re way more interested in selling you new services than helping you with the current one.

2. We totally know what’s wrong, and we’re totally not going to fix it.

Apparently the last person did not read the sign. Surprise! 😛

3. Finally, an answer to the old tough-skinned monkey conundrum.

4. In case this is your first visit to planet earth…

5. We respect your pet about as much as we respect the flag.

6. We never employ females. BTW ask (discreetly) about our “other services.”

7. You will spend your your eternity right here.

8. This could go horribly wrong, but live a little! RGB-PC means yes!

Was it good for you?

9. Gender stereotypes should be learned at a very young age.

Not now, sweetheart. Men are talking.

10. Just figure it out, moron.

11. Whatever you’re trying to do, just stop it.

12. Are you sure installing our software was really a good move?

13. If you can’t configure it yourself, your customer journey ends here.

Are you aware of all the little things your customers come into contact with? There are most likely many that you are not aware of. Until you can truly walk in your customers’ shoes and feel what they feel when they encounter every touchpoint, you’ll never know how these microinteractions translate to the customers, and the worst ones are often invisible from the inside.

Unfortunately, most business leaders do not have the time or resources, and no suite of software can really be capable of finding these things. As you can see, our Customer Experience Investigators™ live for finding these things! Contact us to find out how to start your own investigation and take the first step towards being a truly customer-centric organization.